Our contractor informed us this morning they are no longer going to proceed with our project.  A project we began planning a year ago and have spent the last several months gearing up for and planned our lives around.  A project that required us to rent a house for the work to be done – which we did, based on a confirmed start date.  A project we’ve spent weeks telling our children about, getting them excited for our new adventure and transformed home.

First we were devastated.  Then we were fucking pissed off.  Now we’re fixing it.  The “fucking pissed off” part is coming back, but since the “devastation” isn’t, I’m happy to let us feel this way for a while; kind of use it as a source of fuel.

The reasons? They’re complicated and we don’t fully understand them ourselves.  It doesn’t really matter in the end since I wouldn’t let these people change a light bulb in my house now.

We did everything right:  We took our time, we planned, we entertained bids, we lined up our finances, and we’re still here – destination unknown.  Sometimes we’re passengers no matter how hard we try to be drivers, and the only thing left is to figure out what to do with what you have, not how to resurrect what you’ve lost.  

Can’t go over it.

Can’t go under it.

Can’t go around it.

Gotta go through it.

(and we’re not afraid)

With this around, it’s pretty easy to find some perspective.